THIS IS FASHION...

date 21/10 - 28/10 bought: savers
brand: fashion
size: small
price: $3.99
colour: "vight"
why: because the mankeenie is so 2006
spotted: sipping sangria in saint kilda pre-parklife 2010

i'm still not sure exactly who is it that makes these amazing tees but maybe bruno knows. because he knows fashion, he knows cool. or maybe its not really about bruno maybe its all just me. after all i am the one with an exponentially growing collection of tees. i like to think that as my wardrobe grows so too does my cool.

a little arrogance is a good thing. just remember its not arrogance if you can back it up... and by the end of the year fifty two of the best, random, kickass tee shirts have got my back.

my front

my shoulders

and the upper half of my biceps

bermuda, bahama come on baby mama...

date 14/10 - 21/10
bought: savers
brand: princess cruises
size: small
price: $3.99
colour: ocean blue
why: because i am about to set sail on what will be an amazing week

i am not journeying upon a cruise ship, not one of those massive ocean going beasts filled with everything you'd find in a major city including the crime. no, i will be sailing around some tropical islands,relaxing in the sun and just generally taking my time. with the lonely island's "i'm on a boat" on repeat, and a pair of Terrence™ towel shorts and possibly a captains hat...

not to self: buy captains hat and other nautically themed apparel

jack lives here...

date 7/10 - 14/10
bought: savers
brand: jack daniels
size: small
price: $6.99
colour: mellow yellow
why: my wardrobe was missing a certain bogan element

what i was originally looking for was a a white tee with the classic square jack daniels design. but this is what i found. but, you know... when in rome

i'm not sure exactly what it is that drives people to wear liquor branded merchandise, or why it is so popular with those of a certain socio-economic status. it's probably because i'm too white, too middle class, or maybe just too allergic to that sweet sweet alcohol to understand. wherever it is that jack lives he has become a little cooler in my book. but only because he made a sweet tee

nom nom nom....

date 1/10 - 7/10
bought: savers
brand: philosophy
size: small
price: $3.99
colour: named after the common teal, a member of the duck family whose eyes are surrounded by the colour
why: the colour really brings out my eyes... and it has a kitteh in a lab coat and safety goggles eating a cookie

for all the fans out there the writing under the picture reads "Cogito Ergo NOM". so if a cat was indeed a scientist of some sort what kind of science would he study? Cathematics. what an awful joke. i feel as though i need to make up for it somehow

i know... i'll watch the sequel to jaws on late night channel 7, if only there weren't so many ads for packed to the rafters.

anyone remember that show mork and mindy with robin williams? anyone remember the alien swearword mork used? well it's shuzbutt which FYI is also the name of my cat pictured here. we can thank my brother for that sweet name. he is possibly the biggest jerk i know(my cat that is). one morning i wake up to find him sitting on my bedside table. he was upset because he'd been trying to wake me for an hour. so there he was just staring at me, sitting next to a stack of origami paper knocking off the sheets one at a time... jerk. it took me like 17 cookies just to get him into my photo but it was worth it. if only to feel like david attenborough for 12 seconds

welcome to the black market...

date 24/9 - 1/10
bought: savers
brand: atari
size: small
price: $5.99
colour: my attire for a black tie event
why: because video games are cool

i am indeed classically trained in the art of video gaming. i was more of a commodore 64 man myself though. the atari 2600 was already 10 years old by the time i was born. times had changed the videogame industry had moved on to bigger and better things. i remember getting a playstation for christmas. i bugged my dad so often and so many times that he told me i was definitely not getting one but he lied and i did and it was awesome.

i remember hitting up the golden arcade next to Sham Shui Po MTR station in hong kong, the only place to buy counterfeit games, consoles and electronics. 3 or so stories of a city block filled with stores and stalls selling every computer program ever made. they had this mad system of avoiding the law... the stalls would have big binders with pictures of all the games. you'd point to the ones you wanted, they'd be written down, you'd bargain and eventually settle on an acceptable price. no counterfeit games were ever kept in the store. a phone call would be made and you'd have to wait for the games to be brought to you in sealed black plastic bags or you'd be sent 2 stories down to the stairwell to pick up your merchandise. i was once even sent out of the arcade and down the street, given instructions to knock on a red door and pass them a note.

everyone knows the products aren't real, but no one ever talks about it. the store operators were always a little nervous, always looking around. but the whole black market industry was set up so well they knew when a raid was coming. all at once the message gets out. the customers are rushed out of stores, people hurriedly pack things away, shutters are pulled down and closed fast. before you know it the whole operation is shut down and there you are standing on the street with a hundred other black market customers. there will be no more shopping today.

but tomorrow it will be open again, business as usual. i wonder if it's still there. its been near a decade since i last broke the law in hong kong.

this is my tee...

date 17/9 - 24/9
bought: giordano
brand: giordano
size: extra small
price: $10
colour: stuff white people like #63 expensive sandwiches why: a timeless classic, a tee no collection should be without

This is my tee. There are many like it, but this one is mine. My tee is my best friend. It is my life. I must master it as I must master my life. My tee, without me, is useless. Without my tee, I am useless. I must fire my tee true. I must shoot straighter than my enemy who is trying to kill me. I must shoot him before he shoots me. I will...

everyone i know should own a white tee, even everyone you know should too. when nothing else in your wardrobe will work, this tee will be there. nothing in this world is parallel to rocking out in denim and a white tee, throw in a pair of wayfarers or a simple jacket and there you have it, perhaps the most essential item of clothing you may ever own. from James dean and the jets of west side story to musicians around the world and even hugh jackman as wolverine. there exists a purity that no other tee can come close to replicating. whether you wear yours when your painting a house or when you're partying it up you will become a better person for it. you will be pure, you will be white, you will be untouchable...

except perhaps by those wildly coloured cocktails that the ladies are so found of

My tee is human, even as I, because it is my life. Thus, I will learn it as a brother. I will learn its weaknesses, its strength, its parts, its accessories, its sights and its barrel. I will ever guard it against the ravages of weather and damage as I will ever guard my legs, my arms, my eyes and my heart against damage. I will keep my tee clean and ready. We will become part of each other. We will...

when caring goes wrong

date 10/9 - 17/9
bought: threadless.com
brand: threadless
size: medium
price: Freeeeeeee.....
colour: the colour of objects that do not emit or reflect light in any part of the visible spectrum
why: another choice gift from deejay nicKy T. from those un-matchable lords of internet tee shirt couture

for us down here in the south of the world the threadless phenomenon is relatively new and more difficult to access. but the guys at threadless have been doing what they do for ten years. connecting artists around the world with the ability to see their designs not just printed but seen and purchased by a massive global audience.

what this means for me is another sweet tee to add to my collection. it may not be a Warhol but this tee is another marker of that postmodern world we live in

and hey it has a care bear smoking a cigarette

what could be cooler...